1) Trend alert! Vapid is the new desperate!
2) Scratch that, insincerity is the new desperate.
3) Ali was voted “Cuter than a Button” in High School.
4) Motorcycles have been outlawed in several countries because the aphrodisiac nature of them caused many a steamy panic.
5) America currently leads the world numbers in the over-privileged, under-educated, “Daddy’s Girl” population.
6) Gia is actually Colista Flockhart’s twin. She appeared on the show after losing a bet with Harrison Ford.
7) If it looks like a gremlin, acts like a gremlin, or speaks like a gremlin, don’t let it near the pool.
8) Michelle isn’t actually crazy. She’s crazy for feelin’ so lonely and the meds aren’t helping.
9) All the girls were given a copy “Worst First Lines Ever” with the application paperwork and were asked to memorize at least three. Most thought it was a test.
10) Valisha’s Texas dirt was actually potting soil from the San Bernardino Home Depot.
11) Cooking bare-chested may seem sexy but please be advised of the hazards and consequences that may accompany your morning eggs.
Me likey: Ali and Ella
Me no likey: Rozlyn, Vienna, and Christina.
Quote of the night: "It's competition, I get it. But, there are some girls that have their tah-tahs out to pa-lay! Huge boobs. And I'm probably jealous. Baby boobs. But they're just kind of , like, rubbing me the wrong way, already." -Christina
Let the games begin!