Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Die, Wes, die.

First off, since I know y'all have just been absolutely bursting to know my thoughts on the most recent installment of the Bachelorette, I apologize for the tardiness of this post. My TiVo had a brain fart and recorded an old American Idol instead. Since my children do not see the Bachelorette as the priority that I do, my thoughts come to you fresh from this fine evening. Well, sort of fresh, I had to fashion a Wes-shaped voodoo doll out of rags and twigs first...

First, I would like to dispel any excuses that Jillian may have given for letting Michael and Jesse go. The REAL reasons are as follows:

To Michael: Jillian Stagliano is a real mouthful. Believe it or not, girls really do doodle their names out to see how it looks. That means, in short, you lose.

To Jesse: You should have kept your brother on a leash or better yet, out of sight...or out of the country. From the first awkward moments at the dinner table, I could smell a disaster.

Now onto the meatier issues at hand...

Wes. You dirty, dirty dog. I think that my love for Jillian is no secret, but all the love in my heart cannot save the Bachelorette from herself. Idiot. Then again, what do I know? "Too perfect" doesn't necessarily mean truthful. At this point, I really hope that Jillian and Wes (having been her final pick) are sequestered at some tropical location, viewing what's left of the season. So looking forward to this "After the Final Rose." I told you so, Jill. Couldn't you hear America screaming?

Ed. Oh, you bug-eyed man. I understand that it's hard to stay for a chance at love and risk the very job that you may have support her with, but choosing said job over said girl should have knocked you out of serious consideration upon departure. Sorry, Michael, looks like your rose is going home tonight with Ed.

In the end, I guess it is true that good guys always finish last... at least in Canada.
  • Rooting for Reid or Kiptyn (never thought I'd say that...).
  • Boycotting The Wes Hayden Band's debut album.

Things to look forward to:

  • Jillian's full reaction when Wes calls Laurel his girlfriend. Hmm... I told you so?
  • Cashing in on the bet involving Jillian's bedroom problems.


  1. I have been anticipating this post. So glad it finally came about. I've been in Jillian's position once and it's not pretty. It's so horrible from both ends of the spectrum. It's gonna hit her like a ton of bricks when she sees all that she gave up for a dumb fag named Wes. Ewww she's going to be so disgusted with herself. I feel like the up coming shows I won't be able to watch....but don't worry...I still will.

  2. Brooks- You are the coolest! For real. Thanks so much for the most adorable little dress ever. It's so cute. I will proudly be display her in it her first Sunday. You are so thoughtful. And so much more on the ball than I am. Thanks so much!